Don’t mistake ego for self-esteem—5 signs someone is truly secure: ‘It’s easy to get hoodwinked,’ says psychologist

"When it comes to spotting secure people, it's easy to get hoodwinked," says psychologist Marisa Franco. Here's what real self-esteem looks like.

Don’t mistake ego for self-esteem—5 signs someone is truly secure: ‘It’s easy to get hoodwinked,’ says psychologist

TL;DR

  • People with big egos often seek attention and act superior, compensating for deep-seated insecurity.
  • True self-esteem is recognized through considerate actions, emotional regulation, and authentic self-expression.
  • Secure individuals empathize with others, aim for win-win outcomes, and acknowledge their flaws without shame.
  • They accept all emotions, including vulnerability, and don't see feelings as reasons for self-condemnation.
  • Job success or physical appearance do not guarantee self-esteem; true security comes from internal factors.